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a purple shirt

March 20, 2009

A recent conversation with a male friend, who is nursing a minor crush on a girl at his office.  He explained to me that he was not at all attracted to her until one day when she came in wearing a specific purple shirt – “and I thought she looked, well, ridiculous in it,” he said.  (He was so enthusiastic that his normally excellent vocabulary seems to have failed him.)

So last week, I get the following IM:
Him: she’s wearing the purple shirt again.
Me: all these years of dating angst, and nobody ever told me — just go buy a purple shirt.
Him: i’m sure it has a lot more to do with the way it is shaped than its color
Me: i continue to be amazed at how easy your entire gender actually is
and still none of you understand why we spend so much time shopping.
Him: a vast majority of that time is wasted, i assure you
Me: see? i’ll never understand that disconnect.
a properly-shaped purple shirt is the fulcrum that moves a man’s opinion
but shopping to find that properly-shaped shirt is a waste of time.
Him: (60-second pause)
maybe you’ve convinced me.
Boys, I swear.
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